Motivational Monday 3/6
As we are into March I wanted to give you a little update of where we are
A friend of mine invited me to co-host a “Life Work” Series thru a panel of some other movers & shakers for her Adult Learning University students (a coarse they call Life Development). Now I’m not a life coach, I can only tell you what I know for sure and as a busy Chic Momma, Entrepreneur, PR Chic my life can get a little crazy and with that she needed “real people” on her panel to give their opinion.
I have spoke this many times giving yourself permission in the power of “YES”. When I read Shonda Rhims book “Year of YES” it opened doors for me. So in continuing in my “Life Work” Series with a few panelists of friends I wanted to share my series with you and notes I’ll be taking from others on the panel with a little more expereience other than myself. However either way, I’m hoping you get something out of this if not just dialouge and amongst your peers that get you shakin & stirred and reinventing your LIFEstyle.
What is a Power Word?
All words are powerful in their own way, it really depends on who is listening. For example, if you tell someone that you love them in English, yet they only speak Mandarin, then it won’t have any meaning or power at all. That’s why I’ve come to understand that firstly we must be speaking the same language before any words can have power.
In a sense, words have no power at all. It’s more that they are given meaning by the person who is listening to them. I’ll talk a little more about this later as we can radically reduce the power words have over us to make us feel good or bad just by changing one simple thing about the way we listen.
For now though, a power word is a word that instantly empowers you the moment you speak it. Sure, you can also group words together to make powerful statements, but what I’m talking about here is the power to use two simple words to let yourself and others know exactly where you stand.
Those words are, ‘Yes’, and ‘No’.
How And When To Use Power Words
This is the simplest part of all. Say ‘Yes’ when you mean yes, and say ‘No’ when you mean no. If you stick to this rule then you’ll live a happy, healthy, and empowered life. But if you don’t, then you’ll end up feeling frustrated and resentful that you are not being honest with yourself and others.
The most obvious reason that we would say yes when we mean no would be so that we don’t disappoint someone we love or care about, or if it’s in a work environment where we don’t feel safe to say no. The reality is that the only reason any of us say yes when we mean no is because at some level we are afraid of being honest.
Once we recognize that our fear is in control of our life, rather than our courage, then we can choose to take steps to change it. At first you may need to think about a few different ways to learn to say no without it coming across to harsh or blunt. Once you get comfortable with saying no, then of course, that won’t be an issue.
7 Ways To Practice Saying ‘No’ Gently
1. Right now it’s a no from me, but perhaps we can look at it some other time?
2. It’s not really something that I’m interested in but thank you for thinking of me.
3. Hmmm… that’s not going to work for me.
4. It’s actually quite hard for me to say no to people, but I’m practicing being more courageous, so I’m going to say no right now.
5. Yes, I might be interested in something like that at some other point in time, but it’s a no for right now.
6. I’m not available for something like that right now but how would Saturday at 3pm work for you?
7. I’d prefer not to at the moment but perhaps we can look at it again some other time.
The Power of Saying ‘Yes’ to Yourself
When you say no to someone else you are always saying yes to yourself – and that is a very powerful thing to do. Yes, is without a doubt one of the most powerful words in the English language as it has the power to open doors and create a connection like no other word can.
Conversely, when we say no, it typically creates a disconnection between others as how they react to it will depend on their level of self-esteem. People with low self-esteem, or those who have a superiority complex will see it as a rejection or a personal dig at them. Either way, you can’t be responsible for their insecurities so do your best to love them anyway.
The fastest way to allow the power of the word yes to uplift your life is to get really good at saying yes to yourself – all the time. When you get good at that, then you’ll find it easier to say yes to others when you mean it, and then to say no when you mean it.
Every time you say yes to someone when you mean no, you undermine your own self-esteem. This ultimately leads to resenting what you are doing for others, which will affect how you think and feel about both them and yourself.